It’s no secret that a relationship will change your life. And the more serious it gets, the more things are going to change. I knew that many weekends would suddenly be reserved, that good morning and goodnight messages would be compulsory and that I would have to deal with the wave of crazy emotions like jealousy and obsession – you know, the normal stuff. What I never expected though was that my basic way of life would change forever when he moved in.
1.Cut my toenails
Have you ever realised how loud a nail clipper is when its clipping away at your toenails? I hate the idea of my boyfriend laying in bed hearing that awful sound. Clip clip clip. I have reserved my clipping to when he’s in the shower. With recent water restrictions, I’ve become a pro at cutting my toenails in under a minute.
2.Poop with confidence
This is something my boyfriend has actually asked me. In the two years we’ve been together, I’ve never pooped while we’re together in one building. It’s an incredible accomplishment which I’m very proud of. Not so long ago, he called me out on it, but my answer was easy: ‘don’t be silly love, I don’t poop.’
3.Groom down there
Now, I’m not one of those people that trim the hedges so neatly that there isn’t a trace of it. Meaning my boyfriend can never be around when I do. I have reserved intimate grooming for the golden moments when I’m all alone.
4.Eat (without limits)
Well… because he thinks I have limits. Spoiler alert: I don’t. What he doesn’t know is that every moment I get I eat more than him and his siblings put together.
5.Skip the basics
Sometimes I’m too lazy to shower before bed, and every now again I’ll skip brushing my teeth. There, I said it. But since dating my boyfriend I can’t do any of that. Especially because he usually likes making his moves when the lights go off.
Give it another 15 years or so, and I’m sure I’ll outgrow these fears and be totally relaxed to do those things in front of my boyfriend. For him though… he’s been clipping, grooming and pooping in front of me since day one.